please leave

it hurts me that you came back after all this time, but yet excites me...your presence brings me pain once more that i thought i had buried years ago. please don't bring me this pain, it is something that i don't want in my life...you brought me joy at one time but that time has passed long ago...i was free from it all, but my saying has become true to me and i must face it again. the excitement you brought back was just my artistic side, also some old feelings which don't belong anymore...your cold heart is not worth my time to regain neither as friend or more, you ask of me too much for things that i don't want to do. please leave my life and go back to yours, you are no longer needed for a part in my play of life for your part has been permanently filled...your not the love of my life that i thought you were, i have found him finally to make my play complete. such a different feeling between the two, you would have never set me free nor get rid of my fear...times were great then, but that's all in the past now they are all just a memory...i don't want to remember anymore of those times, please part from me and never come back...you have someone yet you want to have me as well...it can never happen, stay with her and ruin her life don't ruin mine. don't bring me down with you, it is not worth it for my life is too precious...please leave once again and for good...please leave and never return...

By: Deborah B.

true love at last

you filled my heart with joy at one time but now you have taken back that joy that ment so much to me....you once gave me warmth but now you have left me cold...you once gave me feeling but now you left me numb...you gave me love but then made it fade away...i gave you my care and you pushed it away...i gave you the things you wanted but you just laughed in my face....i gave you everything and anything even my heart and you just took it all and stepped on it like it was nothing...it left me heart broken beyond what you can't even imagine and what you will never feel in your life time. looked at old photo's and saw how happy we were in them i thought to my self what went wrong what did i do wrong to deserve this. then i came upon the letter that broke my heart into a million pieces remembering when i read it the first time tears just streaming down my face as my heart shattered and my body went numb. as my family who loves me so tried to comfort me and stop me from crying my heart out to where i screamed out in pain, not even their love can or could repair the damage that you have done to my love for you. after all that i thought i would never love or feel for someone again as i felt for you at one time. time passed and still no one is able to fill and repair my heart and love, just waiting for someone to fill me with love and joy and comfort once again....then he came along. someone walked into my life as a friend at first making me smile and laugh again, then we became more. he fixed my broken heart and filled in the missing piece that not even you could have filled. he gave me his love which i haven't felt in a long time as i give him mine, he gave me the warmth i have been wanting for a long time and i gave him my warmth, he filled my heart with that long lost joy and care that felt so right were i didn't want anyone else's but his. as time went by more the more our love grew were i knew he is the one i have been waiting for my whole life...my true love...my soul mate...my lover and also my friend...i see us growing old together and having a family that we would love for all eternity. i gave him a gift that no one else would ever receive in my life time, the key to my heart and love. i grabbed the old photos and the letter and ripped them into pieces then set them up in flames, finally i am able to move forward once more. the memories of us will still be with me forever which i can't change they wont be the bad ones they will be the good ones. now i have truly let you go and have moved on once again...finally i can rest easy and be happy.

where are you....

Where are you….I look to my left, I look to my right no one there; I look behind me, I look in front of me….no one there; travel far and wide looking for this person who I missed and loved so…. Didn’t realized how much I loved you before you left my side and went your separate way. Sitting in the sand of a dessert thinking what have I done wrong to make you leave…. Was the reason you gave me in a form of a letter the truth, a lie, or was it both all mixed into one? It left me heart broken and numb for as long as I can remember till I couldn’t realize it anymore. Did I really have to wish on a dessert star to make our relationship last? or was it me who had to change to make it last? will I ever see you again and take off this mask I wear once more? Or will I be able to take off my mask completely off for someone else and not hide anymore? where are you…. I don’t want to hide anymore…..

a letter from me to you

when we are together we are our true self's, but when we are apart we are another person. sometimes we try not to show that other person but it can not be helped. when we do show that other person we end up hurting each other and our self's which pulls us apart from each other.
each time we pull apart the pain grows even worse than before mentally and physically.
I never want us to be apart I want the pain to stop I want us to be together without the pain and the hurting that we cause each other. you say some things that I don't know whether your playing or not anymore that is how much damage the pain has caused us. but deep in my heart and your heart we both know it can be fixed it will just take some time. I picture us one day getting married and living a happy and loving life together I want that for us so much you don't even know. when I say I love you i say it from the bottom of my heart and soul. I may be mean and a dork at times and may say something that you might not like but i never mean those things even as serious as i sound. I may question things that you don't like to be questioned but that's just how I am, its not that I have no faith in you its normal to question things that aren't to your liking everyone does that even married couples do. I like us to be honest with each other no matter what. even if i am nosy and sneaking into your things i do it out of curiosity which isn't right and i am really sorry for invading your private things, but to me that's normal. of course you would get mad at first but later you laugh about it and forgive later. my love, I'm sorry for causing you any pain that i have done and it was no fun for me. it hurt me worse than you maybe. I was never good at putting things into words but I do have the talent to write it in this letter to you. the reason why I act weird is because......well that i can tell you with words when you ask. but i want us to be more than just boyfriend and girlfriend but its hard to move on to that level since we don't live with each other that's the next step i want us to take and i am ready to take it I'm just waiting for you to be ready. I love you I really do.....

The letter

My Dear Beloved,

All my life I have been searching for someone. someone who would protect me, love me, cherish me, and keep me close to their side. A someone would would deal with my idiotic ways and my clumsiness no matter how far it goes. We may get into fights and get angry with each other but, that person would overlook those fights and bad energy then look at me and hold me close as we forgive each other for our mistakes that we have made. I want to spend my whole life with this person going through thick and thin keeping each other safe and sound no matter what happens. We may break promises that we have made, but I believe that those promises can be restored and be given a second chance. The person would not only be my soul mate, but also my friend and both relationships have love in them, and with those two combined it contains a great love...greater love than anything else in this universe. The person that I want by my side is you......my soul mate and friend....I want to be with you till the very end of time my love, for I give my heart and soul to you which will stay with you no matter how far apart we are....I will be with you......always.......

just imagining

Parked in the middle of nowhere thinking of you, looking into the night sky. wondering how the stars stay so bright and beautiful; looking next to me wishing you were here by my side , just imagining what we would do if you were here. I miss your smile, your laughter; just imagining us holding each other to keep warm through out the cold night. Missing your soft and passionate kisses that you give me; missing you telling me that you love me. I want to look into your eyes and say I love you; wondering if your thinking about me. I miss every moment that we spent with each other wishing that time would stop and every one would disappear that way its just you and I. thinking about you is what keeps me going throughout the day ,evening , and tough times. Just imagining, that’s all I can do until I see you again. Just imagining.

by: Deborah b.

My lover, my friend

My lover, my friend will we be together till the very end? my soul longs for you, my heart calls your name do you feel the same? I dream the day we meet, standing by your side as your lover and as your friend holding on to you and loving you is all I want to do I look into your eyes into your soul and realize that you feel the same way as I feel you whisper into my ear i love you till the very end my lover my friend your forever mine and I'm forever yours so much love, so much passion, so much intimacy, together forever no matter what i will always be there for you my lover my friend

By:Deborah B.

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by night and day, by day and night i awoke from the dead to say that I love you in every way, you put a rose in my hair that i can not displace will you love me always, i will be placed in your heart forever.

by:Deborah B.

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the day time is so peaceful so clear and blue it looks like an ocean floating in the air the clouds are the fish that come and go the planes pass by slowly like boats floating on the cool calm water birds are birds they never change the sun sets then turns into night a moon that lights up the night sky with its mysterious presence sitting there looking down on us the stars are spirits of the past now gone but never forgotten guiding us through the night into a brand new day

By:Deborah B. & Stephen H.

spring

spring
is a beautiful time of the year
it's the time of the year
where life is born
and revived again
after a long cold season

by:Deborah B.

Far Away

as i walked down the dirt road in the pouring rain i saw you from far away i yelled out your name but u did not answer me i started to run to you but you seem to be getting farther away from me my heart is racing my breath starts to get cold as i run towards you but your not getting any closer i thought to my self as i ran he will never be close to me no matter how hard i try to reach for him the one that i love starts to run towards me i kept on running as fast as my legs can go i see him getting closer and closer i yelled his name again still no answer i saw him through the rain that was pouring down on my head i ran to go hold on to him but he wasn't there he had left me for good i thought as i sat on the bench that was on the road i put my hands over my face as i started to cry my heart out as i sat there crying with my hands over my face someone sat next to me and held me for comfort with my hands over my face i thought who is this person that is holding me as that thought ran through my head the person that was holding me whispers into my ear it's alright I'm here now after i heard that being whispered to me i felt a huge comfort from that person holding me i removed my hands from my face and looked at the person sitting next to me it was my friend who had cared for me through thick and thin i held on to him he held on to me the more i held on to him i felt the pain melting away i looked into his eyes as he looked into mine as he kissed me i thought to my self this is fate this is my love that i was searching for as we got up and started to walk down the dirt road in the rain i held him and he held me i thought to my self I'm not alone i was never alone my love was here the whole time now i can let my old flame go

By:Deborah B.

Eachother

when we first met each other we were strangers as we began to talk we became friends the more we shared we became close the closer we get the more love we have for each other that's when i want to tell you how much you mean to me as our friendship expands so does our love each day i look forward to get the chance to say how much i miss you how much you mean to me how much i love you i look forward to sharing my intimate thoughts with yours how our days went what did we dream about last night so many emotions and thoughts run through my head each day we talk every time we talk i feel like i am accelerating moving forward i want to move forward with the person i talk to each day if we weren't so far away from each other

By:Deborah B.

My Dearest Love

as i saw u lying there in front of me on the ground i thought to myself what happened to the person that i loved my dearest love come back to me i don't want u to go yet as i picked up the body with an expressionless face tears started to run down my cheeks i couldn't help it just looking at the person dearest to me made me have so many mixed emotions it was hard to tell which of those i had carried the body did i into the lake with me as i said my last words to my love i kissed those lips that i am going to miss then i heard a whisper saying don't be sad let me go i will always be with you hearing those words gave me an odd but loving comfort i placed the hands on my loves stomach and let my dearest go forgive my one and true love for not being with you in front of me lies my loves crystal i picked it up and put it around my neck to remember my loved one

By:Deborah B.